10 sentences

1. Our little Tinkerbell continues to grow and play. we adore her and fight over the cuddles she gives out. she recently has been exploring our garden under supervision and its so sweet watching her sniff about and chase flies and pounce on flowers ( actually that last ones not so cute)

Here are some photos taken of her over the last couple of months

oh.. Ill just watch this episode of garfield and then I think Ill have a lay down

2. Lily is loving the summer days as am I. We had a couple of horrid weather weeks but this week we have been having very hot weather. We like going to the park on warm days, putting down our checked blanket and having picnics and running around ( that's not me though , that's Lily)
3. I have become a gardener. I don't know how it happened and I don't profess to be good at it but I have a keen interest and take photos obsessively of my flowers and plants as they grow and bloom. I water and deadhead and just sit and look at them all. I found these photos of my spring garden and beautiful tulips

4. I have been utterly inspired by the website pinterest. I have so many ideas in my head I don't know where to start.

5.I started fertility treatment this month. I'm taking clomid to induce ovulation. I was so HOT when I was taking the pills for the 5 days it was absolutely crazy. I just hope and pray it is working. I can honestly say Ive never been so emotional and up and down in my life as this last 8 months when I realised that we had a problem. please keep your fingers crossed for me.

6. I'm throwing a baby shower for a dear friend of mine. We are making and baking and creating. Its been really great and Ive developed a need to make tissue paper pom poms.

7. My little baby is learning to read. Only 4 still and can read a small first reader. I cant quite believe how fast its gone. only 4 more weeks left of reception. its gone too fast

8.I'm loving hollumi cheese . I grill it and put it on roasted veg with red lentils or I put it on tabbouleh salad . totally delicious

9.cupcake baking and icing is the forefront hobby at the moment. I'm not certain my figure thanks me but my tum tum and taste buds do

10. My mum arrives in 4 and a half week . hurrah! we have lots planned including Disneyland Paris . Too excited!

compliments

This week I changed my twitter avatar to a picture of myself on my birthday. I like the picture which is an unusual occurrence as mostly my self esteem of late is lacking.

a lovely twitter follower who I chat with sent me a private message which said that she had just seen my photo and she thought I was beautiful.

My first reaction was horror and embarrassment, but quickly that turned to a lovely happy feeling. For once I took the compliment and I needed it that day.

I have decided if I can compliment anyone, I will. You never know how you can lift someones spirit

ballet shoes

Yesterday my darling Lily attended her first ballet and tap class with Miss Anne. The most wonderful Royal ballet trained teacher.

I cant even begin to describe the joy when she got a pair of black tap shoes to try on and dance in.

Her posture is wonderful. She sits straight and holds her hands beautifully.

She was joyful afterwards as was I , we cant wait for next week..

TOMORROW

My little high tea table


Is my birthday!

I do love my birthday, Ive always counted down sleeps, insisted on cake and parties and been happy.

Tomorrow will be another quiet birthday for me as I had a few people around for tea on Saturday . I think Ill have tea with the school mums and then Kristian is taking lily and I out for a bit of supper.

I bought myself this cool rocket birthday candle. once a child.. always a child

happy easter

Hoping everyone has a wonderful long weekend. Easter is a camping thing for me. Camping with my family and my good friends Steven and Veronica, and a large amount of family friends. Often there were about 25 of us, that's what we always did and I looked forward to it so.

Now its become a chocolate thing haha. I'm currently trying to blow out some eggs (difficult) to dye , and I made a lovely little Easter display.

Best of all our kitten , Tinkerbell,finally arrived yesterday and is settling in nicely. she is adorable

the royal wedding

its almost upon us. Love or hate royalty , if you live here you cant escape the air of excitement and patriotism at the upcoming royal wedding. People all over the country are having royal wedding tea parties , street parties and braais. everyone I speak to has a plan on that holiday Friday.

Lily has a little royal wedding party on the 28th April. they are having food , dressing as princes and princesses and having entertainment.

We think we want to go into London to watch in Trafalgar square and try and see the carriage.. but a garden party is nice too.

Luckily for my family I am totally excited by the whole thing. i feel like I'm living VE day..

hence the teatowel. the first memento of many I can assure you

HUZZAH to weddings

why is it...

that there is this air of competition between south african people about where is better to live. within country or out ( england)

No one misses Cape Town more than me. I have had some low , low moments over the past 7 years. Perhaps those low moments have wizened me to reality.

Fact is many of us live around the world and come back holidaying. perhaps we will return one day . But please , Please don't tell me how shit England is. Don't tell me the weathers awful ( I Know) Don't use your guilt and ignorance to make me feel awful.

Fact is it isn't all bad. Don't believe everything you read just like you wish all those would be tourists wouldn't believe everything they read about our country.

hearwith ends my rant. Its just I live here and I am offended and hurt when people are so incredulous with my choice. Perhaps choices are limited.... #justsaying

captured images

Spring is well and truly with us and the sun is shining down on us today.Ive had a bit of a blog hiatus , much to a few peoples irritation , so I thought that perhaps the best way to catch everyone up was to show you everything Ive been taking photos of with my i phone.

This field of daffodils and beautiful tree of blossoms was in Greenwich park this Sunday. It was mothers day here in England and we had some fish and chips in the park
Lily in her uniform. I still cant get used to it. she absolutely loves school though and has some lovely little friends. This one is William. His mum is a fellow south African who Ive become friends with. they get on very well and their favourite game is firemen or mummies and daddies..
captured in beautiful st James park. a huge blossomy tree across the pond. Many of you will know this is my favoured London park. I'm still deciding whether I will be in it to see the royal wedding procession
also St James daffodil display

this is my lovely , pregnant friend Sandi. she had a birthday where she turned 20 something. ppffft :) we had high tea in harvey nicols. It was divine!
Kristian and Lily playing the fool in front of a massive tree
I just love this photo. Lily has a tiara obsession . we went down the Thames on the clipper and then went to the park
comic relief at school. we did something funny for money and we had a cake sale after school
lastly. this is our new kitten. she arrives on 21st April. Her name , we think, will be tinkerbell or tink. But its been many things so we will see what the final decision is. she is adorable and so fluffy. watch this space

Love

Happy valentines day to one and all. Even if , like me , you dont get all in a froth and buy flowers , choccies and cards for your loved one, perhaps just a nice cup of tea and a little flower picked from the garden will make them feel loved and appreciated.

I have Lily as my valentine this year and she has mummy and daddy. we are getting cards.

I think thats so sweet and in fact a lot of the kiddies in Lilys class were all hearted up this morning.

Have a love filled day

x

spring?

Green buds. New growth. All things I need in my life.These little tulip and daffodil bulbs have been pushing through the soil for a couple of weeks now and I'm so happy to see them. I need flowers , sunshine and colour in my life. I need growth.

London

I'm addicted to twitter.I love the information that flows, the laughs shared and the general community spirit between people that have never met. I know people all over the globe through twitter and this blog.

On twitter I follow loads of South Africans, mostly capetonians. We know my sad story, i miss my home blah blah... and I guess that's why I follow them , to keep up to date on south African news and issues and to make me feel closer to My beloved Cape Town.

Its a double edged sword though, as every day the Capetonians who love their city ,and lets face it that's most of them ,post pictures of the city that they and I love and I feel longing to smell that African air, to walk on that African beach and to generally be contented.

It occurred to me today though , that I would never change the experience I have had here in London. London is a vastly different city to layed back Cape Town. It hustles and bustles , theatres on every corner . Cosmopolitan people litter the pavements. There is so much to do and experience that in my 6 years here I have barely touched the surface.

We explore parks , and little pockets of quirky shops as well as walking in well known tourist attractions. The above photo was taken on Sunday, We dropped Lily's choo choo nana at Waterloo station and just had a lovely quick walk along the south bank. The sun was shining , but it was bitterly cold. The view over the Thames towards the houses of Parliament really wowed me, so I took a photo.

Never be afraid to travel, It enhances your life and gives you a fuller perspective. London has made me independent. Its made me realise how strong I can be and its given me an education that i would never have got from a book.

on the edge

I have been on Facebook and blogs this week and I see all the photos of the grade 1 kiddies starting school and all the mums and dads being so excited , and I feel odd. Why have I cried 1000 tears this week. why do I feel like a piece of me is missing. why do I feel heart sore? oversensitive I hear you cry..

I told Kristian this morning that the last time I have felt so emotionally out of control is after lily was born and all those hormones were racing about. I miss my little girl. she is gone for 6 hours a day and that's a long time.

However I am happy to report that it seems to be going well. The school is delightful as is her teacher. they have been having a little rest everyday and she has been playing with a host of different children. Her highlights have been the sleep on the pillow on the mat listening to music , playing princesses with rosy and "china girl" (how pc.. sigh.. I'm trying to find out her name) and the singing lessons with the headmistress on the piano. she is apprehensive each morning and is a bit shocked that she must go every day! this leads to me being so tearful all the way through till 3:15 until pick up, then she is full of stories and chatting to her school friends which lifts my spirits, until the next morning...

you get the picture. I'm up and down

She has been so shattered as well as you imagine so I'm adjusting her bedtime to suit that.

My life has changed overnight , but some things have become so clear. I love being Lily's mum and I want to be there for her all through this next school chapter of her life. I want to be present in school holidays and after school. Many people have asked me if I will go back to work now but I wont. personally I want to be there to take her and pick her up from school. I know that's not possible for everyone but I will do my best to make sure its like that for me and lily and Kristian. therefore my entrepreneurial skills will have to be employed to make some money.

thanks for listening to my emotional waffling..

a very big day

Today was Lily's first day at school. Its called reception here and is when the child is 4 going on 5. Lily is starting late as she is one of the youngest so will only be in reception 6 months before moving on to year 1.

She has been very excited to go to big school and we have been gathering things like lunchboxes ,school clothes and shoes. Uniform is not mandatory at her school and i did not want to be half hearted with it so i decided to let her wear her own clothes.

Here she is all ready to go. Its of course the rainiest day ever so we are coated , booted and umbrellaed. we walk to school as its at the end of our road
this is her little lunchbox that her nana Fi bought her with the little teddy and muzzy attached to it
Her daddy drew her a picture to pop in her lunchbox. it says first day at school..full of wonder. that set me off as you can imagine!

she went into the classroom ok , but it is overwhelming, as its a new environment with a lot more people than she is used to.In her playschool there were 8 to 12 kids and now 25. My daughter is a quiet little thing and as her mother I cant help but worry she will be ok. she put her name leaf on the little registration board and I settled her at the table with the farm animals. We said goodbye. I said I loved her and to have a lovely day and just made it out of the classroom before the flood gates opened.

I know she needs to go to school and have structure in her day and learn to read and write and socialise , but I feel so emotional about her going off for such long days at only 4. she only finishes at 3:15 each day.

In SA , we only start big school in that way at 6 going on 7 and then I see its only till 1pm. Its been a huge adjustment for me and I wish I was in cape Town and then she would only be starting pre school today. But its not to be as we are here and her little school is very nice. Her teacher , Miss Pike, is a lovely, young softly spoken teacher from Australia and I have a good feeling about her .

For 4 and a bit years I have cared and looked after Lily. given her her lunch and been very fully involved in all aspects of her day. Today is a very strange day for me wondering if she likes her lunch. Is she eating it. does she need a wee.

I guess as much as she has relied on me I have relied on her. Being far from my family and friends , Lily and I have come up with a little life routine, and all my activities involve her. Her first step to independence is complete , and I must adjust to a new life as much as she must.

I will remember this first stage of her life with such happiness and I hope her school experience is wonderful. I will be there for her every step of the way as she will always be my baby..

snow days

these last two weeks have been the coldest I have had since moving here 6 years ago...yes 6!!!

The cold has been relentless and the snow has caused havoc in a country that should be prepared ,but never are.

when the snow hits though its magical. I love just sitting at my window watching it fall with a cup of tea in my had , and perhaps a biscuit...

after its all settled nothing better than getting all bundled up and going to play. even more magical in the first Christmas week. when you are Christmas mad like me , snow falling in Christmas tree week is hugely exciting. My little girl has been so excited ,what with snow , her letter to father Christmas going up in flames so the fairy's could take it to Santa and the tree and decorations being put up. but more on that later, for now... snow day pictures
manor park gardens



Weber snowman
such a pretty tree

news

* since I last posted a life time ago ( sorry , must try harder) its been Halloween. My little horror dressed as a pretty little witch . we made some beautiful Halloween garlands and hang spiderwebs about. carved a couple of pumpkins and put our sweeties in our bucket. It was so much fun and Lily was totally in love with the whole celebration.

*It was also guy fawkes which is called bonfire night here. I suspect it used to be called Guy fawkes but some pc health and safety crap came along and they changed it. I could be wrong and am just flying off the handle. it wouldn't be the first time .. Look at the pretty fire works at blackheath. record numbers attended this year and it was fabulous
*Our dear friend and lifelong neighbor had her first child here in London. Little Isabella rose was born on 31 October weighing in at 2.3kg. she is a tiny little dolly and I got to hold her for a lovely long time when we visited. her mum and dad are doing a brilliant job
* Lily has been dancing for a tv show called pineapple dance studios. It became a huge hit last year as a reality documentary show about the famous pineapple dance studios in London. Lily's dance teacher pitched an idea to them about her class being filmed and next thing we did a normal hip hop class and a special Christmas dance class. they all had to be little elves and hopefully diddi dancing , Lily's dance class will get major coverage as her teacher and owner of the company is fantastic

* the clocks changed and it got all dark and wintery. the leaves fell and are littering the pavements in orange and the coats came out and are hanging on the coat rack

*Christmas fever entered our house as I start planning Christmas activities and days out. so far we are seeing the ballet of the snowman at sadlers wells on the 23rd December and going to hever castle again to their narnia Christmas and to see father Christmas in his grotto. Lily is so excited again ,and talks about father Christmas every day. When she discovered I was following him on twitter ;) she was amazed! I have been decorating pine cones that were picked up, with tartan ribbon and glitter, and in my new ideal home Christmas magazine they have all these paper decoration and wreaths that I will be trying to make, as well as a gingerbread house.

love to all and hugs to those who need them

xx

sweetcorn chowder

Tonight I am attempting a sweetcorn chowder. I had sweetcorn chowder many years ago at a friend of my parents ( that'll be you aunty Gail) and its a meal I remember. I have always wanted to make it and then I happened upon a recipe for sweetcorn chowder with king prawns. I will let you know how it goes.

I have been cooking very different sort of food lately as I went on a diet of sorts to lose some much needed weight and hence i have adjusted my cooking. I have discovered halloumi cheese. Its absolutely delicious!. I make a roast veg bake with red lentils and then grill chunks of the cheese on top . ok, ok this is what you do. cut sweet potato , butternut , leeks, red pepper , mushrooms , courgette and put them into a ovenproof dish ( omit veggies you think are yuck) dribble over olive oil and season and roast until just tender. then add a cup or two of red lentils and about a cup and a bit of veggie stock. place back in the oven until the lentils are tender. remove from oven and place chunks of halloumi onto the bake and grill for 3 or 4 minutes until they brown a little. its totally delicious.

in other cooking and baking news. make sure you tie up your child's long curly hair when baking as if they put their head near the bowl it may get caught in the electric beaters causing major psychological scarring and a nasty cut. you will feel awful for days. that is all

pacing the panic room

I happened upon an amazing new blog today vis other blogs, as you do.

Pacing the panic room is written by a man and I have loved going through the archives . his documentation of his wife's pregnancy is so beautiful, their home and everything in it is so interesting to me. His photography is so personal and touching.

do have a look

walking with Kings and Queens

A couple of weeks back we went to the beautiful Hever Castle , In Kent ( south east England). Its only about 45 minutes drive from our house and I was so sorry we had not been sooner. Its absolutely beautiful there. It was the childhood home of Anne Boelyn and henry the VIII stayed there when they were courting. Its a beautiful little Tudor castle with the most beautiful grounds. There are 3 mazes. The yew maze, the wooden kids maze and the hilarious water maze that is impossible to get through without getting soaked , which I found out on the first stone I stepped on! This is the moated castle with one of my fancy pants effects
The front of the castle is covered in this stunning virginia creeper which turns deep red in autumn

there s a great kids playground with these tunnel slides. that poor sod under Lily is her choo choo nana who went down 5 times. I went once but it scared the crap out of me
This is the view from the Italian gardens over the lake. the rose garden was also out of this world


well worth a visit if you are ever near Kent.

the home cook

My Mum has always been a cook. She loves cooking and I have so many of my childhood memories of her entangled around cooking. She is not much of a baker but has instilled a love of cooking and baking with fresh ingredients to me. She has taught me the basics like how to make a rou .How to reduce a sauce , but she has also taught me when to cheat when your time is short or you could not be arsed.

I'm a baker. I have always loved to bake. I like tried and tested recipes as well as new unusual ones. I like my recipe books to have character and to have lived in the kitchen. This book below is my Mum's Ina Paarman origional cookbook. she is a South African Home economics teacher who started a cooking school , published a cookbook and is now I assume a Millionairess with ranges of seasning and sauces.

This is her original cookbook bought by my mum when she used to go to Ina's classes. Ina has signed it for her. I always wanted to go to those classes when I was little. Its a battered, stained book full of the history of meals cooked and cakes baked. I love those stains.
I recently got the hummingbird bakery cookbook . Its a divine little bakery in notting hill selling very famous cupcakes to all the stars like Gwyneth Paltrow and Me. their most famous being their Red Velvet cupcakes , made famous in New york.
I made this banana cake which was just lovely and so easy and i got my first little stain on the page. I was so pleased....

1. I miss wrapping up school books. I was reading a blog ( Hi Lee) and she wanted to wrap her journal and a wave of nostalgia washed over me as I remember going out with my mum to buy wrapping paper or brown paper and plastic to wrap my books. My favorite year was a year I got light blue paper with tiny hot air balloons all over it, Good times

2. Playschool has begun again and Lily is doing 3 mornings a week in preparation for her starting reception on 4 January. Its so soon I feel ill.

3. We went to watch Charlie and Lola's my best bestest play at the Greenwich theatre and it was delightfully wonderfully great. It was a mix of 2 D puppets with 3D sets and 4 puppet masters if you like. We all enjoyed it so much and one of us even had a strawberry ice cream in the theatre...

4. Strictly come dancing 2010 launched here on Saturday. Regular readers ( whom I apologise to for my absence ) will know my love of the strictly show. I do nothing on Saturday evenings. Kristian does all of Lily's bedtime routine and I get a glass of wine and watch my show. geez I'm old. Also it signals the beginning of the Christmas countdown for me as the show runs till Christmas week

5. Speaking of Christmas I saw Mince pies and panetone in sainsburys the other day. A little early in my humble opinion. Not that I'de say no if someone offered me one with a cuppa.

6.Lily is into jokes in a big way. admittedly some are not funny in a traditional way but to a mother they are hilarious. Her favorite one was told to her by Aunty Ronnie and I'm working on her doing it on video for me and I will post it.

7. This morning I told Lily a little bird had told me something so she looks at me and then at the window and asks " was that window open last night?) No I say. " How did the bird get in then ? It took me a while to twig and I have made a mental note to remember children are very literal

8. I got a stunning new cath Kidson bag with my birthday voucher. Its so beautiful I want to sleep next to it every night.

9. Love is all around at the moment. I have been witness or heard about so many love matches in the last month through people I know. 1 on twitter, and 1 on facebook. Many have met on these sites. It seems traditionally chance meetings and dating are out of the window now. Personally , although i love that Chance meeting thing how realistic is it these days that you may meet someone like that ?

10. I have started healthy eating and walking and am feeling better about myself already. I think I may be in for a long haul when i stood on the scale but I think in a few months I will see some improvements