Wicked

A year ago I had the idea to start up a dinner club like I have the pleasure of gatecrashing when I am in Cape Town. I love going with the girls in Cape Town its such great fun and such a release, all the laughing , cackling , sharing of feelings. I wanted to have something in London as I always felt that was lacking. I threw together 3 ladies I know from different spheres of my life that all now live in London. Sandi (far left) I have known for 10 years or so but we only became much better acquainted after we both moved to London. She married my school friend Jason. They are one of my favorite couples in the world and she is one of my favorite people. She is bright , beautiful and has such a kind , generous nature. Lailaa ( next up) went to my good friend Caroline's yoga classes and we met at a few yoga events. On her arrival in London she contacted me and we had tea in Greenwich and a few weeks later Lily and I went to her flat for tea. I have only known her well for a year now but she has such a special place in my heart. I love her enthusiasm ( for a lot of the same things as me) and her love of life. She is without doubt one of the most thoughtful people I know and I am so happy to call her my friend. Jenny (far right) worked at the emporium with me at Tygervalley shopping centre. I had a lovely little fairy shop and she had a jewellery shop. I then carried on working in a stencil and craft shop and we worked 2 small shops from each other. We hit it off and have been friends ever since for about 7 years now. She is an ultra enthusiastic , optimistic person who will brighten every day. We get on like a house on fire and if I leave London It is her I will weep about as I know she loves it here and I wont see her as much and enthuse about Christmas and food and beautiful things.

For a year these ladies have given me something to look forward to. they have given me friendship and connection when I most needed it. We are all so different but yet similar. We are aware our arrangement is fleeting as some of us will move away, but for now we look forward to our monthly gup (read, east of the sun) Happy 1 year anniversary to the gourmet goddesses. ( official gourmet goddesses blog update to follow) In honour of this occasion we went to see the fabulouso Wicked. It was brilliant. Loved it . didnt we girls?

appreciation

Do you think you appreciate what you have? I know I don't , there are times when I find life so frustrating and wonder why it has taken me on the path it has. Recently though, I have started to write down what I am grateful for in a little gratitude book , if you will.

To remind me that even though there are some things missing from my life there are others that are present and wonderful. Don't get me wrong , I think its totally appropriate to feel sad or angry at some of lifes twists and turns , but don't forget the good things. For every up there is a down . For every rose there is a thorn.

Slowly I am growing and learning that the downs make the ups even more sweet.

I am having a down day today. Missing my mum , missing my dad,missing my brother, missing my dear friends and all their dear babies. But I know that tomorrow or the next day I will feel brighter again. and a few weeks after that I will see them all and we will laugh and have fun.

My biggest gratitude in life is that by some miracle the universe gave me a gorgeous daughter who fills my life with happiness. the path I take is now not only for me but for her too. So you know that good day I will have tomorrow? It will be because of her.

ride ride ride

I just have to show you a small selection of my tomatoes. after this no more I promise

Lily is leaning to ride a bike. I was under the impression that with the little fairy wheels (thats what i call them) she would pedal and then in a year or two we would remove the wheels and then the real work would begin

But no.. it seems Lily finds it easier to pedal backwards and she finds it ever so fun when her mummy and daddy push her really hard and she just pedals backwards wildly. We are running behind her shouting. Pedal FORWARDS! push DOWN on the pedals Lily! But no... thats no fun

After an hour.... Milly, Lilys imaginary friend, had a turn. Lily ran after the bike pushing it wildly shouting. pedal FORWARDS Milly. Push Down on the pedals. Then she just stood there shaking her head at Millys inability to pedal

in memory of

Kristian's Grandad, great grandad John, who passed away yesterday just 17 months after his beloved wife Joan. What an amazing man he was. At times stubborn as a mule as his family would attest to but such a gentleman. We saw him a month or so ago to have lunch and he arrived in his suit and tie as he usually does. He drove his much loved Rover until the day he died.

My absolute best memory of him was when he got his new car ..a rover of course, and there was a silver badge on the one side of the boot. He was unhappy with the lack of symmetry so he set about searching for a badge to even things out.

His daughter and Kristian's mum , Michele told us you will not believe what he has got and upon arriving at his house one day we saw a silver playboy bunny badge glued to back of 84 year old mans car in Bournemouth!. he was completely unaware of the playboy bunny logo of course. he just liked it!

He was born in London and lived his youth there before going to Bournemouth with Joan and his 3 children. He fought in world war 2 and he was so fascinating. the stories he had to tell were just riveting.

I will miss the times we go out for lunch together , but for Kristian he has lost his father figure.

we will always remember and love you John

all about me

Pia had this on her blog. So I stole it. sorry Pia.

1. What time did you get up this morning? 6:30 and dozed whilst ceebeebies played in the background till 7:00. Dont be judging now I need that tv in the bedroom!

2. How do you like your steak? medium rare..anything else is just not worth eating

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? the time travellers wife. oh how I cried

4. What is your favorite TV show? at the moment strictly come dancing is about to start so that. and mock the week and ugly betty and How I met your mother and the inbetweeners... you get the picture. I like tv

5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Totally 100% Cape Town

6. What did you have for breakfast? museli and yoghurt with a little sprinkle of blueberries on top and a cup of strong tea(or 2)

7. What is your favorite cuisine? hmm I am a bit of a foodie. sushi , asian ,Italian , French

8. What foods do you dislike? brussel sprouts. totally disgusting!

9. Favorite Place to Eat? a good restaurant with my friends or family. its about the whole package

11.What kind of vehicle do you drive? Daewoo matiz

12. What are your favorite clothes? jeans

13. Where would you visit if you had the chance? My next places I want to work towards are Geeece and New York but I have lots on my list

14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full? half full. I have these glasses, they are rose tinted

15. Where would you want to retire? at the seaside with a little place to live where I could cook and be happy

16. Favorite time of day? the evening when the sun is just setting especially in summer. I find it so tranquil

17. Where were you born? Mowbray hospital , Cape Town

18. What is your favorite sport to watch? favorite , sport , watch...sorry I dont understand the question

19. Who do you think will not tag you back? Look may I just rant about these questions yet again NOTE TO ME ME MAKERS STOP PUTTING THIS QUESTION AND THE NEXT 2 IN!!!

20. Person you expect to tag you back first? See above!

21. Who are you most curious about their responses to this? See above!

22. Bird watcher? woman?...no....... fowls?...no

23. Are you a morning person or a night person? I really do both equally. I am moderate

24. Do you have any pets? No I would love some though

25. Any new and exciting news you’d like to share? I am leaving for Cape Town in November

26. What did you want to be when you were little? famously I said I wanted to be a part time astronaut when doing a little quiz thing with Caroline, but I wanted to be a teacher. still would like that

27. What is your best childhood memory? swimming all day , plettenberg bay hoilidays, playing till the early hours making up stories which we acted out , going shopping with my mum and brother

28. Are you a cat or dog person? oh how difficult. I love both but love cats a bit more. have always been obsessed with cats. I broke my front tooth trying to catch a cat to stroke when I was 4. bit of useless info for you

29. Are you married? yes , recently

30. Always wear your seat belt? Always. i always obey the law

31. Been in a car accident? just the one when a wooden plank came flying nto my windscreen

32. Any pet peeves? Oh yes Many. mean nastiness. all other drivers ,snooty customers ,rude teenagers ,insensitivity , the pull top juice carton....

33. Favorite Pizza Toppings? avo and bacon yum. and rocket goats cheese pine nuts and caramalized onion

34. Favorite Flower? tulip

35. Favorite ice cream? coffee or pistachio or mango

36. Favorite fast food restaurant? indian

37. How many times did you fail your driver’s test? never. passed fist time

38. From whom did you get your last email? facebook . someone I dont know commented on a photo I commented on

39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? my card is maxed sadly at British airways.But I would love to go to bluwater and just spend £1000 on pretty clothes and things. just for kicks. we can dream

40. Do anything spontaneous lately? yes went to the beach suddenly the other day and thats an hour away. not huge spontenaity

41. Happy with your job? childrearing..yes. shop assistant..no

42. Broccoli? yes I eat it lightly steamed

43. What was your favorite vacation? europe and the UK when I was 10. It so sticks in my mind

44. Last person you went out to dinner with? the dinner club girls to a tapas place in covent garden

45. What are you listening to right now? beginning of ugly betty (I must hurry)

46. What is your favorite color? red orange or green

47. How many tattoos do you have? no none .

48. How many are you tagging for this quiz? FFS

49. What time did you finish this quiz? 21:10

50. Coffee Drinker? No headaches but a huge tea drinker

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Playschool

There she is, my little munchkin, all ready to go to playschool. She was a little worried the day before it started and kept complaining of a tummy ache (so her fathers child!) but with that she was excited as well.

When we arrived she clung to my hand and did not want to go and sit at any of the little tables that where set up with various activities and toys so I sat at the table with the blocks to fill out my various forms whilst she settled in and played a bit. One of the 3 lovely ladies that work there came over to her to ask her if she would like to paint which was so perfect as painting is her favorite thing to do! She happily held her hand and went off to put on the apron and paint. I bit my wobbly lip , handed in my forms and went over to her to say goodbye telling her I would be back at the end to fetch her. Once again she had the worried look but she did not cry and off I went blubbing as I walked down the streets of hither green.

God how I watched those minutes tick by. time slowed considerably and then I fetched her. Kristian came with me and we stood outside with the other mums and dads. when she saw us she ran to me but would not speak to me at all until we were half way home. the only tears we had were when she asked Kristian if he had missed her and he assured her we did miss her and she told him she missed us and began to cry. its enough to break a mothers heart!

Once she got going telling us the things she did she chatted away for ages. she painted 3 pictures and sang songs. they had a story and she played with the threading beads with another little girl (who apparently did not know the words to the song either)

So all in all it went well I think. We will see this week , now that she knows I am leaving, that she will perhaps cry a little. she does amaze me as she is so grown up with her attitude towards things. she knows exactly why he must go to school and whats expected of her. I am so proud of her and I know she is just going to love school.

As for me , I still have a huge lump in my throat, even as I write this , but I am learning to let go little by little . I also have this excitement in me. when will she write her name or draw a figure that does not look like a blob. these things will come and I will be joyful.

the first cut

This is the week my little girl will leave me for the first time and start her school adventure. She starts a little playgroup just down the road from us as of Friday. She will only be going once a week at first and as soon as she has settled they will give her some other mornings.

I know its absolutely silly for me to feel so forlorn but I do. On the one hand I know she will love it and it will be so good for her. she is in need of some social interaction. I also know that I will love it soon too with a little time to myself , but for now I feel downhearted.

Perhaps its because Lily and I have been constantly together since she was conceived. I have been far away from family and friends who would have her for a few hours so its just been me and her. when I have been away she stays with her daddy.

Now someone else will have a little part of her. They will see how she reacts to something funny or sad. I wont be there to laugh with her or wipe her tears. I know slowly I will lose more and more time with her and I am well aware that that is my job. to prepare her for life.

a small part of me in the background cant wait to see what she will learn and what she will bring home for me to stick on our fridge , but I think that part may stay hidden for a week or two whilst I adjust. So for now I am forlorn.

how to bore people with photos of your tomatoes

yes these are them, my tomatoes. grown from seedlings, watered , loved and now...eaten

bits and bobs

I took Lily to soft play today for the first time ever. Don't know why I have not taken her before but I have not. In fact I was thinking that she does not do a lot of normal kiddie things and i must assume its because of our parenting. Today I just giggled as I watched her return all the stray balls to the ball pit. I went over and said "darling you don't have to clean up , just play like a child" Ok mummy, she replies and runs off to primly slide down the slide. she got right into it and her friend Emma , who is a year older than her and is a seasoned soft play expert, showed her how to get all the way to the top of the big tower thing. they had a ball climbing and sliding.

My tomatoes are all ripening now and we have had my home grown cherry tomatoes in our salad the last 3 nights. they are so flavourful and fragrant having not seen the inside of a fridge. I just go outside and pluck them off . I am like a proud mama showing them to everyone who will look. My neighbor has been growing runner beans as well and they all came over the fence so now I am awash with them too. I had a moment of guilt when I thought she might be on the other side thinking her harvest was so crap this year while I had 50 runner beans on my side , but after some investigation I see she has plenty so... I am eating runner beans. I actually love them even though I am not a green bean fan but with these I remove the stringy bits and chop into bits. place in the microwave for 1 min with a drop of olive oil and a tablespoon of water and lovely crisp beans come out. I cool them and put them in a salad as I am a salad person.

My good friends Gavin and Catherine had their second baby boy last week, Jasper. He looks so adorable and I wish I could be there to go and see them and give them all a hug. I am so pleased for them and after having a chat with cath in the week I am absolutely certain I will wait to have another baby in Cape Town. She is the only other person I know who has given birth on the NHS and even though its OK and everyone lives you want it to go better. I see the NHS has been in the spotlight with America using it as a what not to do. Of course all the British public have now jumped to its defence. Why do people do that? moan and bitch about something until its criticised and then they jump to its defence. Don't get me wrong bits of it are very good but it comes down to this.. there are not enough doctors , nurses and midwives to go around. this countries population grows on a daily basis and its all at bursting point. I also have an issue with the "free" thing. Sure if you are on benefits or under age or a pensioner its free for you, but as a working adult you pay national insurance contributions which go towards this exact thing. My husband pays in excess of £350 a month to NI. just saying..

I have decided that now is the time for me to drag out Kristian's vintage I pod and make it my own. I want to put all the music I love in one place. I will keep you posted on my wide and varied music taste.

My lovely friend Sandi posted me a magazine she knows I love and another one she loves for me to try. I was so happy when i received them and it made me realise that its these little things that friends do that make them good friends. I am blessed with a good handful of good friends that truly care about me and I about them. Some are old , I have known them forever and know exactly what they are thinking, friends and some are newer friends that I am learning things about every day. But this much I know, most of my good friends don't even live in the same country as me and even after 5 years away we are still close. I know who my true friends are through that alone and for that I am grateful

Just a small note to say. have any of you seen that new Shakira video where she is in the cage!! what the hell are these people doing to me. I have an impressionable 3 year old!!

party time

On the Saturday we had Lily's little party. I invited a friend and her daughter who I see every week and a few of the little girls and boys from Diddi Dance. Due to it being right in the middle of summer holidays only 2 little ones could make it and a friend from South Africa brought her cute kiddies along. It was such a lovely day . For the first time Lily did not cry on her birthday and even smiled all through us doing her happy birthday and candle blowing. I made some lovely cupcakes and iced them with a cream cheese icing and little pink flowers. We also had fondant fancies , teddy biscuits ,and cherry bakewells. I did a fruit platter and some mini rolls with cheese and ham for the picnic part and all the kids sat and ate their food on the rugs I had put down in the garden. We moved onto a little sticking activity . I had spent like, 400 hours drawing and cutting out 6 teddies with clothing that the kids could stick on with googley eyes and pom poms for noses. they absolutely loved it and I can highly recommend that for a 3 year olds party. the pass the parcel was slightly less successful. I put on the cheery chitty chitty bang bang song and so we went ,however, once one child had received their layer with gift they were not at all interested in passing the gift around so I passed it from child to child..still fun though.

There were glaring gaps in our guest list as one set of grandparents , uncle and honorary auntys and uncles and precious children were missing..and they were sorely missed. I had a little empty bit in my heart and wished that everyone could be together.

here are a few photos of the day
Lily , Emma and Connor tucking in
the teddy bear making
picnicing from left Evie , Emma and Lily
some of the table

someone turned 3!

On Thursday 13th August my little baby turned 3. where have the first 3 years of her life gone? She is a fully fledged 3 year old now with strong opinions and an imagination second to none. She has no less than 3 imaginary friends who celebrated with her. Milly , Sister and Boo Boo all came along to join in the celebration. She wanted to go to the park on her birthday which was great as we bought her a beautiful pink bike. The fact that she only pedals backwards made it quite an exhausting visit.

he had an entirely pink cake which was her request and she ate it with relish.

So ..happy birthday my darling girl. You are the sweetest , most special little girl and you fill mummy's heart with joy

xxx

bits and bobs

Over the last month I have taken very few photos but these are the ones I did take. First one in central London on friday. We met our friend Leila for a spot of shopping.
theres the gorgeous Leila
Kristian , the giant man. this is Carnaby Street
you must excuse the blur but I was trying to be quick. heres my little munchkin watching monsters inc with her Sully (from monsters inc) on her lap


She has such long beautiful hair now we plait it sometimes. her backpack is cath kidson and the little cat is Mr Cat. I am sure you all know Mr cat by now. Please note my oak floors. I will weep when we are parted
Greenwich park after we went to the cinema for lilys first cinema experience

this is a "not another photo" face
running!
In the cinema waiting for bolt to start

you have to...

read Dooce's blog. its brilliantly written, roll on the floor funny , poignant in the right places . Most times I am either crying with laughter or crying at the touching sentiment.

read it!

my garden

I have recently become totally entranced by my garden. I have grown tomatoes and sweet peas and geraniums. Lavender , petunias and a sunflower. I have a lovely pot full of herbs which I use daily. Its giving me such joy seeing everything grow and flourish. I love standing there watering everything in the early morning.

so in my first installment of new house pictures I present.....

My Garden

keep calm...

here's my birthday present. I have of course hung it , very aptly, in my kitchen. Its a WW2 poster that was in Aldwick station in the war years. I just love its vintage feel and its message. you can see them at the keep calm gallery

a whole bunch of stuff

Movies

Lily is into them in a big way. I find the way Children grow and advance an absolute wonder and this little age is just adorable. At our house we are Dr Suess fans. Kristian is a bit kooky and all the kooky language and themes suit him and lily down to the ground. The first film she really loved was The Grinch. its actually mine and one of my favorite Christmas movies. She sits transfixed living every scary and funny moment. her face is a picture and I spend most of my time watching her reactions. Over the weekend we bought the cat in the hat with Mike Myers. She is just in love with it. We have watched it 3 times already but the first time we sat down and put it on I made us all a nice pizza to share and we sat eating it while the film played. She stayed up a little later than usual and it felt so good that she is old enough to do all of this now. At the end the children shout at the cat in the hat and tell him to leave and before I knew it the little things lip was quivering and she had tears rolling down her face. I quickly explained that he would come back and they had learned a lesson and she felt better but it was like a milestone in a way. she cried in a movie (note to lily; If you are anything like your mummy darling this will not be the last time this happens) she is now emotionally advanced enough to know what is touching and what is sad. it was quite a day

Books

as we are talking about kids books I thought I would give a few recommendations. I always like to hear of good books. so do comment with some names if you know of some.

the Winnie the witch series is brilliant. the illustrations are really magical and the stories are fun and just long enough for a toddlers bedtime story. We have Winnie in winter , Winnie's new computer , happy birthday Winnie and I hear father Christmas has purchased Winnie at the seaside.

I love all Julia Donaldson's books but my favorite is the gruffalo and room on the broom. Her books all have a variety of illustrators and all are enchanting.

You cant go wrong with Winnie the pooh. Always enchanting

Aliens love underpants- hilarious

Mr peek and the misunderstanding at the zoo was something we picked up at waterstones and its very amusing and keeps the attention

there was an old lady who swallowed a fly. If you are like my husband you can remove all the dies's from it but its not half as much fun.

lastly, on her recent visit my Mum bought Lily a south African book called fussy Freya about fussy little eater . she loves it and its great to see SA children's books.

Holidays

I have booked 3 tickets aboard an aeroplane for us to Visit Cape Town in November and December (Kristian) to say I am excited is an understatement...

Birthdays

Lily is 3 next month and I am busy planning a little party for her. how I love all the planning. I have decided on a teddy bears picnic because soon enough she will want hannah montana or something equally awful and I love all the innocence of bringing your teddy to a birthday party. I have a plan to put blankets on the ground and set my table with little sandwiches , sausages , cupcakes and maybe some ice cream to end. I thought a little game of pass the parcel might be a goood introduction to games. I will put the same gift in every layer. I will let you in on a secret..I hate party games. As a kid I was so shy and i would pluck up all the courage to go to a party and then you have to spend the whole bloody thing racing with a bloody egg on a spoon or being blindfolded and in the spotlight whilst stumbling around with a donkeys tail on a sharp pin. Not my bag.

Anyhow I digress, I am having great fun with this party even though a lot of the people who I would love to have there are not around but I know she will love it, she is just entering that age where party's and birthdays are ever so exciting.

Babies

My darling Friend Veronica has performed yet another miracle by conceiving (with Stevens help) another little baby. I am so happy for them that it has happened this way. It gives everyone hope that sometimes things work out just as they should.

I am now of course doubly broody as any mention of a pregnancy and my ovary jumps a foot. I really would love another baby, but I really would love to concentrate on moving back to Cape Town and settling ourselves with the one toddler we already have. but if I leave it it might be too late or too big a gap? Oh what to do.....

lastly, do check out the gourmet goddesses blog as we have had some fab nights out. those girls are a lifeline for me. I have the best time out and about London with them. the things we see....

heatwaves, strawberries and cream and summer

Yes its Wimbledon time again and I was lucky enough to go again this year. I always go with my good friend Jenny who is a tennis bof and she tells me all this interesting info. We queued from about 8;30 and were in fairly quickly. We had a wonderful day watching a veterans match with Martina Navratilova and were in the front row before going to Henman hill (or is it Murrays mound now?) to watch one of the Williams sisters get through to the final (again). I do find them annoying , I don't know why , perhaps that arrogance that is often on display does it for me.

From there we decided to take our chances in the queue for tickets into centre court which we got quickly as well and it was one of the most thrilling tings ever to be in there. Its so big and imposing and to be sitting there after watching Wimbledon since I was a child was such a treat.

Before we embark on the photos please let it be noted that it has been heatwave conditions in England and on this day it reached 38 degrees on centre court hence the glow I have..oh and the flat hair...